I don’t know how much I’ll be around this week. There’s a few things I want to post about but right now I’m a bit overwhelmed. I’m concerned about a couple of friends. I use that term loosely as they’ve rarely, if ever, confided in me or vice versa. Acquaintences seems too sterile a term and since I wouldn’t hesitate to respond to either in need, I will continue to consider them friends.

One who I have never met and am not close to at all but have suspected for awhile now that there was something not quite smooth going on. I never said anything. I felt it would’ve been stepping out of bounds but it’s nagged at me. Well…suspicions were confirmed this weekend. It’s not a situation that impacts my life nor is it “my place” approach this person any further. Yet the concern continues to hover and push into my consciousness.

Another person in my life has seemed…off. Another someone I’m not close to emotionally but am around on a regular basis and find myself illogically drawn to. Again – there’s few, if any, overt signs that anything is wrong. A quick chat asking “Are you okay?” was answered with the expected “yup”. At least this one I will probably have the opportunity to see soon though what good it will do is beyond me. Even if I am able to discerne that there is in fact something “wrong”, again it’s just out of my realm of influence.

And maybe that’s what’s really nagging at me. I know there are people in my life hurting or stressed or struggling and I can’t do a damn thing about it. I don’t expect that I can FIX anything. But in these cases it’s not even a matter of being there for them to lean on or talk to. I just have to stand aside and remember these are adults with the capabilities and support system to handle whatever comes up in their lives. Whatever concerns I have, however badly I want to reach out – it’s irrelevant in the grand scheme of their lives.

On a positive note – I met with Sadie yesterday and it was a wonderful experience. I left rejuvenated and calm. And right now I’m clinging to that a bit and using it to regroup and refocus. If one of those people were to reach out to me I would available, no question. But it does no one any good for me to focus on situations that I have no role in.