I was just enjoying a nice little nap when TheKid came bursting in and announced while jerking off my comforter “You need to get up NOW”. Which is unusual. No. Unheard of. He LOVES when I nap because then I’m not up to tell him to come inside, turn down the tv or hang up clothes. As I blearily grumbled “WHAT is going on?” (note, I’m functioning on a distinct lack of caffeine and sleep) he answers “Someone is here.” Again, unusual.
That someone turned out to to be the father of the boys across the street. Remember the ones that slept over a few weeks ago? He told me he’d just caught TheKid and two other boys holding down his oldest and beating him up. He seperated them and took each boy to their parents. TheKid leaned against the wall, arms crossed, sullen expression upon his face. My blood pressure shot up and I think flames MIGHT have shot from my eyes when I turned to glare at him. He stormed into his room where I heard him fling himself onto the bed. I told the dad I’d take care of it and watched as the father visibly relaxed. He finally half smiled and said “Thank you. You’ve been the only parent who cared.”
So where’s the problem?
TheKid INSISTS they weren’t beating this neighbor boy up. He INSISTS that he was “only” holding his arms so the boy wouldn’t hurt them and trying to help carry him back to his apartment because he’d bit his younger brother. He gave me an elaborate detailed story but stumbled over a detail that I questioned him on (little brother went to tell his parents his bro bit him, then asked TheKid to go back to the same apartment and get him a bandaid…wait, why didn’t he get one while he was there…oh I forgot, he didn’t ask me….uh-huh). He SWEARS by this story. And always in the past when I’ve called him on a lie, he’s broken down and told the truth. Not this time. But? He was licking his lips constantly. He couldn’t tell me what the other two boys were doing while he “just held his arms”. And he kept that sullen look on his face the whole time. In the past if hes been falsely accused or wronged, he has been in tears. As recently as earlier this week in fact. There was none of that this time.
I KNOW boys play rough. This particular group loves to wrestle. The thing is, the father knows all that too. He also knows how much his boys fight and what an instigator his son normally is. TheKid spends alot of time over there at their place. Like every afternoon. And all I’ve ever heard is how much they enjoy having him around because he helps keep the two brothers off each other’s throat. So if this father felt his son was threatened enough to drag my child home and pull me out of bed, I feel like it was pretty major.
So now I’m at a complete loss. I told TheKid my reasons for doubting his story. I asked several times “What exactly did his dad see that made him think he was in danger?” and “What were the other two boys doing?” He could.not.answer me. Or would not. All I got was a shrug, a scowl and an “I don’t know”. Not answering the second question bothers me the most. I don’t expect him to understand how a parent might view what the kids see as just rough fun. But he should be able to tell me exactly what he saw happening.
Part of me is scared of reacting wrongly and planting the seeds of distrust between TheKid and I. I don’t want him to hesitate to come to me in the future because I didn’t have his back this time. But…I don’t feel like he really deserves my support in this case. I really feel like there was more going on than he’s telling me. That something unpleasant occurred between those four boys. In the past I’ve always been able to discerne what really went on and dole out comfort or punishment as needed. This time everything screams to me that he’s lying. And for the first time he’s not budging. All I’m getting from him is that sullen expression, sulky posture and actual anger from his eyes. I sent him to shower (what IS it with little boys smelling like dead rabbits anyway?) and told him to stay in his room until he wanted to tell me the full story. He came out long enough to give me his dirty clothes, a glare and “I’ve already told you what happened so this won’t do any good.”
I don’t know what to do. I will go talk to the father and find out exactly what he saw. But TheKid has never shown any signs of malice before. Quite the opposite. He’s usually the champion for the underdogs. He’s usually trying to mediate the little spats that happen among their group. This would bother me no matter what his history but it’s so completely out of character that I’m completely shaken up.
So. Suggestions? Ideas? The father isn’t home right now and works nights so I can’t talk to him until tomorrow (Saturday) afternoon. Do I continue to punish the kid based on my (possibly flawed) instincts and the other parent’s story? Do I tell him everything is on pause until I find out more?
I suddenly feel very very inadequate over here.
